Today I don’t need to dig too deep to see what I’m feeling because all my feelings, good & bad are right here at the surface of my soul. I’ve become more spiritual in recent months and I know more than anything that GOD is near to me, either carrying me or guiding me or even giving me that little nudge to let me know he’s here. Knowing all of that I ‘m still feeling as if it’s never going to get better though the reality is that it will get better but I just don’t feel that right now. I’m on the verge of tears every moment and even when I don’t want to talk about it a simple act of kindness by a “hey how are you feeling ?” Makes me feel like completely breaking down. I just say I’m doing ok because I know that if I say how bad i feel someone will want to talk about it further & sometimes I don’t want to talk about it. My ego is crushed I feel like a child trying to get around, my 3 yr old does better than me. I’m confined in our room, with no one to interact with as my husband is too busy with the kids, I feel very alone right now and don’t know which end is up! I need to pray and bring GOD to the surface to fight some of these feelings for me. I need to keep his love and power close to my heart to help me heal. GOD is the only that has the power to get me through this mess.